But what is it? You see me post about it and you can’t understand why I even bring it up (or maybe you do, who am I to judge?). Executive Functionings are mental skills that allow us to plan, organize, execute, manage different aspects of our life. I love to use the example of when I am in the shower (not necessary to picture that, at all). As I get cleaned up I begin to think about what I am going to wear for the day. I am visualizing in my head the outfit and thinking about where the pieces are located. I am going to wear my fav jeans from the closet and the Rolling Stones sweatshirt that is in the laundry room and my Air Force 1s are in the mudroom. This skill is something that kids today are practicing and doing less and less. Ever hear yourself saying “Patrick! We have soccer today! You need to get your cleats and shin guards and get downstairs now!”. We have innately become parents who do all the thinking for our kids. I see this even more with the concept of time.

Kids today have zero concept of time. “It’s going to take forever!” or “I will get it in 1 minte” ::20 minutes later::. This has a blame from many things but one thing that sticks out the most to me is the way we watch television. Back in the day (what up my 90s kids) when we watched TV (TGIF anyone?) something would happen every 15 minutes of a show: *C O M M E R C I A L S* We knew the halfway point or the quarter marker (of a 1 hour show) because after roughly 15 minutes 2-3 minutes of commercials would come up. This was the time that we ran to the bathroom, grabbed snacks from the kitchen and ran back to the TV to not miss the show coming back (IT’S BACK!!!!!). While annoying, this taught us the feeling of time. We FELT elapsed time. We FELT how long 15 minutes were and FELT how fast 2-3 minutes would go by. We FELT 30 minutes or an hour. Because of the breaks, we planned what we would do in our 2-3 minutes to be efficient to get back to the show and not miss a beat. Today? Netflix. Hulu. Disney+ (and so on..) have created series that vary in times and are continuous. It is to the point that Netflix will ask you if you are still watching (mind your business, Netflix, let me live). For kids, this becomes a    D.  e.  e.  p. B.  l.  a.  c.  k. H.  o.  l. e. where they do not even realize how much time has gone by since they first sat down to tune in. Executive Functions are what make us successful not only in our personal lives but in our professional lives (academic lives for our kids).

Knowing this, J and I take steps to help our kids develop their EF skills. (Did you know that EF skills keep developing well into our 20s??) With my background in SpEd and my current life struggles (where’s my mom tribe) of raising 3 little boys I find that the knowledge that I have is one that is super important for helping my kids develop. For tips on EF in the home for your littles, follow @TheAverageMomCT on instagram or you can check out services I offer in Executive Function Coaching.

Want a great Executive Function activity you can do with your kid? Cook!

Skills we worked on to make pizza were:

Time Management: How long will it take to gather the ingredients, construct the pizza based on the recipe, bake in the oven and enjoy.

Planning: What materials will I need (parchment paper, the ingredients, a baking sheet, – chef’s hat optional) what will clean up look like?

Organization: All materials ready. Oven has been turned on. Recipe card is out and being followed through the multi-step directions.

Adaptive Thinking: Having flexible thinking when the plan takes a shift. This could be the oven stopped working or you are out of a certain type of topping. It is overcoming the obstacle to continue to move forward.

Self-Monitoring: Having time to reflect on the process and outcomes. Our son was able to look at his final results and note that he used too much sauce which made his cheese fall of easily. I asked him what he will do next time, his response was “duuuuh I will use less sauce”.

 

Executive Functions are crucial both in and out of school and are explicitly taught. Find the opportunities you have to help build these skills with your little nuggets.